Top 10 CIO questions:

Why can't I get on the board?
Why won't the financial director let me spend any money on IT?
How can I adopt a service-oriented architecture-based approach?
What is service-oriented architecture, anyway?
How does opening up 20 new data centres square up with our green computing strategy?
What on earth has love got to do with it?
How can I outsource the entire IT department and still look like I'm responsible for something?
How can I tell the chief executive to get stuffed?
Why does everyone hate me so much?
How long is a piece of string?

-- From http://knowledge.computing.co.uk/2007/09/top-10-question.html